I decided that there’s a few more annoying advertisements out there that I’d like to harp on today. I wanted to start a two-part series today, but I think that’ll go better when I can pull my readership above twenty. So, here’s a few more annoying internet, television, and even radio advertisements that get on my nerves.
- Rollover Ads – Oh, aren’t these fun. The viewer gets tantalized into seeing a short clip or title of a Flash movie that “can be fully viewed” by hovering your mouse over the ad. The trouble with this is that these ads are usually of the banner variety. As such, when you go up to close the browser window, tab, or access toolbar features, you have to weave around these in order to avoid a screen-dimming video that you may not have wanted to see in the first place. What’s even better is the minuscule “[Close|x]” that is aggravating to find and then click on.
- “News Article” Ads – A bit of a misleading title, but it’s the most fitting. These web advertisements are designed to look like news articles about the recovering economy, how it’s a good time to buy a house, how the stimulus is amazing, etc, etc. Also included is a small clip of a repeating GIF that has ABSOLUTELY NO RELEVANCE to the ad. So far I’ve seen a black woman who repeatedly puts her hands up to her face and screams for some reason, and a clip of a white woman being recorded from behind while jogging. If that’s supposed to come across as appealing, I have no idea who is deranged enough to believe goal is accomplished through these ads.
- “Talk Show” Radio Ads – Again, a misleading title. My literary talents are amazing, I know. Anyhow, these ads are designed to sound like you’re “returning” to a local broadcast, until you suddenly realize you’ve never heard these people before. Things of note are the commercial’s lead-in with muzak, utterances of “uh”, and tonal adjustments to seem like real people talking as opposed to a pre-recorded message. This is a novel idea, yes. Hearing it over and over and over again, however, is nerve-grinding, as you know where the pronounced “human element” portions of the commercial are, and wish to avoid hearing them. Perhaps this is just my reaction, but, still, ick.
- 1-800-My-Lemon – Oh dear god, Radio or TV, I don’t care. STOP SINGING THAT NUMBER! (Fortunately this commercial has abated in the past year. Oh thank goodness.)
- “Learn The Secret” Ads – Yep, apparently these are all simple tricks to whiten your teeth, lose your belly fat, and cure cancer that were all discovered by a mom through one easy step. Suuurre. I have never clicked on one of these, so I don’t really know how to follow this one up. I also don’t think I care to do so.
I can’t wait until I have my own webspace and get rejected by everyone who I request advertising revenue from.
Let These Advertisements Die, Too!