Vending machines are like miniature gas-stations. Well, without the gas. Or usually the cigarettes. But they do contain the pre-packaged treats, gum, and chips that we oh-so enjoy. However, there is a critical flaw that can occur with vending machines.
Now, I’m not talking about the folded bill frustration, where the machine keeps spitting your paper tender back at you, despite the correct alignment and your hands’ desperate attempts to flatten out the cash. Nor am I talking about the time limit lockout, where some machines are set to be used only at certain times of the day, denying that late night craving for Cheese Squiggles.
I’m talking about the great injustice of the vending machine, the cash taker. Categorized by the insertion of money, coin or bill, and the lack of a deposited goody, this event is frustrating by a few factors:
- If it’s a spiral machine, you may get to see your item move forward and prematurely halt before the end of the rung, or tip against the glass just so it’s suspended tantalizingly close. This increases the frustration factor exponentially.
- You know you need to shell out more money in order to get your item. The bonus to this is that you may be able to get a second item, too.
- However, if you lack the appropriate funds, you may have to walk away, knowing all the while that the next person to pick your choice may get that two-for-one deal, too.
Despite these agonizing conditions, here are some tips:
- DO NOT bang and kick the machine.
It has feelings too.It is a machine, and may break or in some way hurt you if you get angry at it. You may get your candy, but you don’t want to have to pay the damage cost for things that may occur to the machine by your actions. It’s just not worth it, man.
- DO NOT rock the machine back and forth, especially from the front. If you choose this, the next thing the machine may be vending could be you-pancakes. There may be a bit of wiggle room to shake it from the side, but, talking about the damage thing, it may not be the most favorable option.
- NEVER stick your arm (or, uh, other body parts) into the machine past where they are intended to go to receive your item. Anti-theft devices may just get that arm lodged up there, making a hilarious yet unfortunate situation fall upon you. This is worse if the unit is refrigerated.
- Finally, DO try to contact someone who may be able to help. Especially if there’s a vending machine re-filler around, but one rarely lucks out like this. Even if no one can help you, give it a shot. You never know until you try.
There is hope on this matter, however. Machines are being engineered to more ably detect when this kind of no-delivery has occurred, and will refund your cash with a satisfying plink! into the return tray.
Convenience occasionally isn’t, but at least we’re getting smarter about it!
Let Vending Machines That Leave You Hanging Die