You, Ke$ha

I’d like to start off this post with a tiny introduction: if the name “Ke$ha” stays around more than 5 years, things are worse in the world than I thought. Why don’t I like you, Ke$ha? Let me count the ways…

1) Your “Name”

Ke$ha is not a name. This is indisputable; a name contains letters and only letters. You’ll be happy to know that on Wikipedia you are known as “Kesha” and on WordPress you are known as “Keha”. (I hope that when I’m done, you’ll be known on WordPress as deplorable.) Admittedly, your name is Kesha Rose Sebert, and that I’d accept. But you’ve chosen to stylize it in a way that is disappointing to the knowledge and integrity of the English language. Way to go, $uper$tar!

2) Your “Music”

The quotation marks are more than necessary here. You’ve taken an adaptation of Electropop that can only be adequately described as “talking while tipsy”. Music cuts out entirely so that your exceedingly painful vocals come screeching through. Your music sullies the genre and damages the ears of listeners. I sincerely recommend that anyone who believes that Ke$ha is a singer have their hearing checked and their mental stability examined.

3) Your “Image”

Self-described “garbage chic” fashion rebel, you embrace the trashier side of human appeal. This makes sense, as everything else about you appears to be trash. The statements you attempt to defend yourself with are defeated by your party-girl/drunkard image. Respectable and talented people need not stoop to generalized appeal, THEY SIMPLY NEED TO BE GOOD AT WHAT THEY ARE DOING. Which you are not.

I keep telling myself that this is just a fad, that you’ll be long gone when the next big thing comes along.

And you know what hurts the most?

The possibility that I might be right.

I think this will be the "After" photo.

Photo Credits: Here (and thanks to whoever made this. I can’t stop laughing. The blog article is also INCREDIBLY well done. I’m not crazy, see!)


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